How To Turn F*** You Into Thank You

Yes, I just went there! And now that I have your attention it’s time to get real.  But before we have this conversation I want you to stop and think about that one person in your life that knows how to trigger you like no other; the one that is the source of all your pain.  The one that you envision falling off the face of the earth because if they did your life would be utterly BLISSFULL.

It didn’t take long for you to envision that person…am I right?

We all have someone in our life that we wish would F off.  Whether it is a family member, an ex, in-laws, a coworker… There are some people that we can’t avoid and we can’t get away from.  For whatever reason they are in our lives and avoiding them isn’t always an option.

Ever wonder why they are in our lives? Is it just to cause suffering? Or, is there something cosmically greater at work here? Think about it.  If we are all here to grow and evolve as compassionate beings, then how would we do that if we didn’t have people like this in our lives.  If life just handed you perfection on a gold platter, would you really appreciate the life you had? We can’t know bliss if we don’t also know anguish.

Pain is an emotion that every single one of us will experience.  We can’t avoid it! And it’s an emotion that many of us want to find a target for.  It’s easier for us to say that someone else is the source of our pain or that this person did me wrong because pointing our finger towards ourselves is too painful.  The reality is that we are triggered by a deep insecurity that we already have brewing inside ourselves.  We are reactive because they are triggering parts of us that are unresolved, parts of us that feel that we are unworthy, and parts of us that feel that we are not good enough.


Thank you for showing me what unresolved parts of myself still need attention. Thank you for allowing yourself to be a mirror for what I need to work on so that I can grow.  Thank you for pushing hot buttons that I didn’t know I still had.  These people that trigger us are our greatest teachers.  I know you may not see it that way right now, but trust me they are.

The truth is nobody can make you feel a certain way unless you allow them to.  Nobody should have that power over you:  the power to control your emotions.   So put that finger down and know that you are worthy and you are enough, and believe it!


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